BUT WHAT DO I DOOOOOOOO........ (AKA Live Through This)

Okay,so part of that title was just a smoke screen to reference Hole's 1994 album which really does cover a lot of ground on how shitty it is to be a woman in this world. But that's not what this post is about, this post is about REJECTION!!!!!

Yep that's right, REJECTION ( I know right?, why do I keep yelling it? because this is how you hear it in your head, that's why) this post is about choosing someone that doesn't choose you, wanting someone that doesn't want you, caring about someone that doesn't care about you. Some people find out about this in a marriage, some people find out in a romantic relationship, some people find out in an alleged friendship or from a family member and some in an unrequited love situation, whatever the deal the hand sucks.

It's hurtful knowing that you care about someone who either doesn't care much or cares very little for you. It's heart-wrenching knowing that you'd like someone in your life in whatever context when that person doesn't want to be there. Well there's no solution. I'm sorry but there isn't. It hurts, it sucks but it heals with time much like all things, it may always sting a little but it will never feel as fresh as the moments when you experienced it and it won't spend forever immobilizing you and locking you in a prison of self-doubt. It's not the end of the world unless you want it to be.

It's hard to come back swinging from something like this, so often it's best not to swing, try slowly crawling out when you're ready a little bit at a time. The most important thing is giving ourselves space to heal when we need it, jumping back into life again is just a band-aid reaction that will eventually cause an infection. The trick is to feel it, suffer it and know that eventually it won't feel that way. This is the hardest part to it (trust me, I know) but human resiliency goes with the territory, we can and will be okay, it's possible. I know it sucks, I feel it, let it suck, until it doesn't.

-Joy (here and there)

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